Monday, November 9, 2009

36 Weeks, 2 Days... OMG!

I'm sitting in uncharted territory.

I haven't made it this far in a pregnancy. Josh was born at 36, Joey was born at 34.

Well, Kimber tried to come at 34. On 10/25, I started contracting every 5 minutes, and did so until I finally made it to the hospital and spent the night hooked up to the monitors and I was given two rounds of Terbutaline. Needless to say, David did not stay the night with me. I am mean, MEAN, MEAN when I'm on Terb. That's what was given to me when I was into pre-term with Josh and it was not a pleasant time. The next morning, they sent me home on the oral med of Terb, and I lasted a week on it. I just couldn't take it anymore and I was yelling at the boys for no reason... it was just so bad. So, I lasted a week on the Terb.

And then this past Thursday, at almost 36 weeks, I was back in the hospital around midnight, contracting every 5 once again. I was only dilated to 1cm, which wasn't enough to go ahead and do anything. My doctor had wanted me to do the Terb shots again, and I refused. So, we tried another oral medication for the night, Procardia. Well, the contractions didn't let up, so I went back again on Saturday morning, at exactly 36 weeks. And guess what? I haven't dialated anymore. So, the doctor on call, called in a script for the Procardia, since I'm refusing Terb completely orally. I went ahead and gave in for a shot, and it helped for 30 minutes, but the contractions started up a bit.

I didn't want to take anymore medications, but my body needs a rest. My uterus is so tired and so worn out. I'm not sleeping, even with Ambien to help. I go back on Wednesday to see my doc, and I'm hoping for some answers. My uterus is just pissed off, to put it bluntly. I am trying my hardest to suck it up, but I just can't anymore.

So, as a recap...

We found out I was preggo on April Fool's Day. A week later, I had to start taking Progesterone shots (given daily by my adoring husband). Then I lost a good amount of weight, and Kimber became growth restricted, a.k.a. interuterine growth restriction IUGR. So I was put on modified bedrest.

Then my depression hit again. Then after only gaining maybe 10 pounds finally by around 29 weeks, I was diagnosed with gestational diabetes. We tried maybe 3 weeks of oral medication to help control my levels, and that failed. So I've been on insulin shots for 3 weeks. Then in and out of the hospital 3 times...

I just can't take much more. I feel like I can't be the mommy and the wife that I want to be. I do know and have faith that this is all going to worth it to see my sweet baby girl and hear her first cries and as wrong as it sounds, see her "girl parts" so I know this is not a dream! And I can't wait to see the expression on David's face when he meets his daughter for the first time and I can't wait for the boys to meet their baby sister. Our family will finally be complete.

I'm just needing some prayers for strength. Can ya help a preggo out??

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